Keeping up with the Joneses: Trying to Impress is Keeping you Broke
Don't buy things you can't afford, with money you don't have, to impress people you don't like. ~ Dave Ramsey
Stop trying to keep up with the Joneses
I've seen this circulating around the internet and I think it rings true every time.
Stop trying to keep up with the Joneses they're broke anyway.- Brad berger
We all know at least one couple who seem like they are doing fun things all the time. Going on vacations, going out to eat regularly, buying new vehicles. It can be easier than ever to compare your life to others, especially with social media at our fingertips.
But so often we don't realize the sacrifice that others make to pull off the fancy vacations or new cars, we don't see the struggle, we just see the status symbols.
I’ve had my fair share of times where I used a credit card to throw a dinner for friends or go shopping, because saying no was just too painful. There's been plenty of times I've had to turn down road trips, or a night out on the town. All the while wondering how they manage to pull it off.
The Joneses are struggling
Well let me just say once you get to know ”the Joneses” more intimately you start to see their struggles. You start to see the sacrifices it takes to pull off that lifestyle. I’ve learned it's not all it's cracked up to be.The Joneses are struggling, they have large car payments, piles of debt , and are living paycheck to paycheck waiting for the next bit of cash flow to come in so they can buy more stuff and go on another vacation.
You won't be able to keep up with them, they can barely keep up with themselves.
So often we compare ourselves to people. Often the people we compare ourselves to don't even share our values, or have the same goals in mind. If you don't want to be like them, or to have their lifestyle, why are you chasing after it? Even if you do want to be like them, you don't know what it takes for them to live that way, the sacrifices they have to make, the priorities they choose.
Finding Financial Freedom
If you want financial freedom, don't look to someone who isn't financially free for answers on how to accomplish your goals. Never take advice from someone that you wouldn't want to be like.You wouldn't take relationship advice from a friend who has had multiple failed relationships, or health advice from someone who is always sick.
So why look to someone who’s drowning in debt, & wastes their money, for what to do with your own money.
Don't get me wrong, I've been there too.
I have fallen into this trap just like everyone else. We romanticize someone else's lifestyle even though when it comes down to it we don't want to be like them anyway.
If you have a financial goal you have set, look to people who have accomplished those goals for advice on how to get there. If you have a set of values and morals you want to live out, look up to someone who is living those values out in the way that you would like to.
Find friends you don't feel the need to impress.
Choose better Role Models
There's nothing wrong with having role models, but are looking to the right people to be role models. Are they someone you can look up to? I’m sure we’ve all heard the saying “you are the average of the five people you spend the most time around”..... look around you , do those people represent who you want to be.
If you woke up tomorrow and had the same life as the person you compare yourself to, would you actually be happy?
If yes then maybe they are a good role model, but if the answer is no…Then stop comparing yourself to someone you don't want to be like anyway.I know it's easier said than done to stop the habit of comparison, but it can be done.
Comparison truly is the thief of joy.
When you find that you're starting to compare yourself, or your lifestyle to others, stop and ask ..
Do I know this person well enough to know what they're actually like?
Would I really want to be like them?
What could they have sacrificed for that lifestyle?
Do they even have the same values or goals as me?
Just a couple questions can help you become aware of when your comparisons are unrealistic and pointless. It can also stand as a reminder of who you are, and who you want to become, so you can stay focused on what you actually want.
Don't let someone else's ideal, become your own. Choose the life you want, and go after it. Don't let comparison distract you.
This post is just as much a reminder to myself as it is to you, none of us are perfect, and we certainly don't all have the same idea of what perfect even is.
